Ammunition.
Kamis, 16 Juli 2009
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komentar
Doesn't a post entitled "ammunition" seem like it's going to get down and dirty and schnarky? heh. I simply didn't want to say "bullets" again for this type of fill-me-in post.
So. The shit in my life has taken over. I'm not actually too busy to blog, I'm just too lazy and depressed to blog. And then I get too far behind and I think of all the wonderful people (you) who are keeping tabs on me, which makes me know I need to go catch up and support you, which overwhelms me, which makes me watch another episode of "nurse jackie" or whatever else I have DVRd. It's a vicious cycle.
My life isn't totally shit though, there are lots of good things about it. I bet most people looking in wouldn't even realize the bad state I'm truly in, as I ~think~ I'm hiding it well, which of course backfires on me when my true feelings suddenly pop out and the other person doesn't understand what the fuck is up with me.
This may be long, but as lengthy as I am when I type, I'll try my best to be brief but to also catch you up on everything.
~ Death Cab For Cutie was awesome. Tom doesn't like them, as they are quite emo, so he wore his "fuckemos" (a texas punk band) shirt in protest. But he was a good sport. I think Ben's voice is beautiful. My wonderful friend E's husband is their tour manager and we got vip tickets, meaning we got to sit in the roped off area adjacent to the sound board, so we we had lots of room and a fabulous view of the show. I got super loaded and we ate at ihop before going home. Happy anniversary to us.
~ The braces bunch girls are awesome.
I've received a few cards and notes in the mail recently and I couldn't be happier about it. Something about the fact these girls took the extra time and energy to send a card is just amazing. So THANK YOU bb girls. I promise I will turn around and support you all right back someday. But for right now, just know you really did something to brighten a shitty day.
~ No word on hep c yet. I have an appointment for a blood test early next week.
~ My tooth. Holy shit. In pure nancy-luck fashion, a toothache has turned into a $4,000 headache. Let me just give the quick rundown.
- Over a decade ago, one of my molars (tooth a) cracked while eating nachos. NACHOS.
- Got a root canal.
- Root canal got infected and had to get it redone.
- A few years later, the tooth behind it (tooth b) started hurting. Tooth A's root canal was failing and it infected tooth b.
- Tooth A is pulled (can't redo it a 3rd time)
- Tooth B gets a root canal
- The tooth in front of tooth a (tooth b), gets drilled down to fit a temporary bridge.
- Tooth A's "hole" won't stop bleeding. I'm paging dentist. No answer. I'm bleeding a lot. I filled up 2 water bottles with spitting blood within an hour. Hubby makes me go to ER. Emergency oral surgery at 1am from a very understanding dentist the hospital paged removes temp bridge and stitches me up.
- I go to my dentist next day and he's an asshole. Says I'm too swollen now to do anything. Doesn't apologize for not answering page.
- I develop dry socket on tooth a's hole. Most painful thing ever.
- I come in to get bridge fit and dentist goes to give me shot and I flinch, as the dry socket pain was indescribable. He gets flustered at me flinching, yells "god damn it!", stands up quickly which makes the little stool he was sitting on fall to the ground. He takes off his gloves, throws them down and stomps out. I am so shocked at his behavior I break out in tears. Nurses say he's an ass and they fit my bridge themselves without any novocaine for the exposed root of tooth c.
- I file complaint with state board and to my surprise, it's taken seriously. It goes to trial and dentist loses his licence for a year. Not for him being an asshole, but for not answering his page when I was bleeding. They looked at that as he put me in a life threatening position.
- Which leads to last week. Tooth B hurt. My root canal is now failing and infected. Dentist sends me to entodontist. My body is rejecting my tooth. I am told I need to get back molar (tooth b) pulled. Bridge cut off at tooth C (leaving the crown on shaved down tooth) and an implant inserted in the hole for tooth a and tooth b. OR I can just replace tooth a. Silly me wants all my teeth. Except it's $4,000 per implant. So looking to at least replace tooth b.
- Oral surgeon to pull tooth b. Endodonist to place implant in my jaw bone. Dentist to fit crown on implant. Estimated $4,000.
~ My foot isn't healing as quickly as I think it should. Saw surgeon today and he said "this sometimes happens" and explains that I'm still severely bruised. Gave me pain patches to go right on foot so my tummy isn't torn apart from even more ibuprofen. I go back in 2 weeks.
~ Going to Mile High Music Festival this weekend with some of our best friends. I am so excited to see The Black Keys, Incubus and Tool. Ben Harper is playing at same time as the black keys, so I'll miss him, but I'm still super hyped.
~ Family is good. I put up pictures and news on my other blog.
~ There are so many bloggers I am missing right now. You all know who you are.
~ Which brings me to thanking you all, once again, for the comments. I read EACH AND EVERY ONE of them and honestly, sometimes that's what gets me through a day. I can't list all of your names here in this post, but I could. I know who is supporting me and gosh, I feel so shitty I'm not doing the same for all of you. You guys have been my rock through a lot. And while I understand shit I'm going through isn't too bad, shit being piled on top of shit is starting to look like an impossible mountain for me to climb. So thank you. From the bottom of my heart. Thank you for commenting. I appreciate each and every one of you. And can't believe some of you still take the time to comment to me when it seems like I'm not responding to you. But I swear that I know each and everyone of you who is commenting and I can't thank you enough for being my friend.
So. The shit in my life has taken over. I'm not actually too busy to blog, I'm just too lazy and depressed to blog. And then I get too far behind and I think of all the wonderful people (you) who are keeping tabs on me, which makes me know I need to go catch up and support you, which overwhelms me, which makes me watch another episode of "nurse jackie" or whatever else I have DVRd. It's a vicious cycle.
My life isn't totally shit though, there are lots of good things about it. I bet most people looking in wouldn't even realize the bad state I'm truly in, as I ~think~ I'm hiding it well, which of course backfires on me when my true feelings suddenly pop out and the other person doesn't understand what the fuck is up with me.
This may be long, but as lengthy as I am when I type, I'll try my best to be brief but to also catch you up on everything.
~ Death Cab For Cutie was awesome. Tom doesn't like them, as they are quite emo, so he wore his "fuckemos" (a texas punk band) shirt in protest. But he was a good sport. I think Ben's voice is beautiful. My wonderful friend E's husband is their tour manager and we got vip tickets, meaning we got to sit in the roped off area adjacent to the sound board, so we we had lots of room and a fabulous view of the show. I got super loaded and we ate at ihop before going home. Happy anniversary to us.
~ The braces bunch girls are awesome.
I've received a few cards and notes in the mail recently and I couldn't be happier about it. Something about the fact these girls took the extra time and energy to send a card is just amazing. So THANK YOU bb girls. I promise I will turn around and support you all right back someday. But for right now, just know you really did something to brighten a shitty day.
~ No word on hep c yet. I have an appointment for a blood test early next week.
~ My tooth. Holy shit. In pure nancy-luck fashion, a toothache has turned into a $4,000 headache. Let me just give the quick rundown.
- Over a decade ago, one of my molars (tooth a) cracked while eating nachos. NACHOS.
- Got a root canal.
- Root canal got infected and had to get it redone.
- A few years later, the tooth behind it (tooth b) started hurting. Tooth A's root canal was failing and it infected tooth b.
- Tooth A is pulled (can't redo it a 3rd time)
- Tooth B gets a root canal
- The tooth in front of tooth a (tooth b), gets drilled down to fit a temporary bridge.
- Tooth A's "hole" won't stop bleeding. I'm paging dentist. No answer. I'm bleeding a lot. I filled up 2 water bottles with spitting blood within an hour. Hubby makes me go to ER. Emergency oral surgery at 1am from a very understanding dentist the hospital paged removes temp bridge and stitches me up.
- I go to my dentist next day and he's an asshole. Says I'm too swollen now to do anything. Doesn't apologize for not answering page.
- I develop dry socket on tooth a's hole. Most painful thing ever.
- I come in to get bridge fit and dentist goes to give me shot and I flinch, as the dry socket pain was indescribable. He gets flustered at me flinching, yells "god damn it!", stands up quickly which makes the little stool he was sitting on fall to the ground. He takes off his gloves, throws them down and stomps out. I am so shocked at his behavior I break out in tears. Nurses say he's an ass and they fit my bridge themselves without any novocaine for the exposed root of tooth c.
- I file complaint with state board and to my surprise, it's taken seriously. It goes to trial and dentist loses his licence for a year. Not for him being an asshole, but for not answering his page when I was bleeding. They looked at that as he put me in a life threatening position.
- Which leads to last week. Tooth B hurt. My root canal is now failing and infected. Dentist sends me to entodontist. My body is rejecting my tooth. I am told I need to get back molar (tooth b) pulled. Bridge cut off at tooth C (leaving the crown on shaved down tooth) and an implant inserted in the hole for tooth a and tooth b. OR I can just replace tooth a. Silly me wants all my teeth. Except it's $4,000 per implant. So looking to at least replace tooth b.
- Oral surgeon to pull tooth b. Endodonist to place implant in my jaw bone. Dentist to fit crown on implant. Estimated $4,000.
~ My foot isn't healing as quickly as I think it should. Saw surgeon today and he said "this sometimes happens" and explains that I'm still severely bruised. Gave me pain patches to go right on foot so my tummy isn't torn apart from even more ibuprofen. I go back in 2 weeks.
~ Going to Mile High Music Festival this weekend with some of our best friends. I am so excited to see The Black Keys, Incubus and Tool. Ben Harper is playing at same time as the black keys, so I'll miss him, but I'm still super hyped.
~ Family is good. I put up pictures and news on my other blog.
~ There are so many bloggers I am missing right now. You all know who you are.
~ Which brings me to thanking you all, once again, for the comments. I read EACH AND EVERY ONE of them and honestly, sometimes that's what gets me through a day. I can't list all of your names here in this post, but I could. I know who is supporting me and gosh, I feel so shitty I'm not doing the same for all of you. You guys have been my rock through a lot. And while I understand shit I'm going through isn't too bad, shit being piled on top of shit is starting to look like an impossible mountain for me to climb. So thank you. From the bottom of my heart. Thank you for commenting. I appreciate each and every one of you. And can't believe some of you still take the time to comment to me when it seems like I'm not responding to you. But I swear that I know each and everyone of you who is commenting and I can't thank you enough for being my friend.
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